Remember Me

It saddens me to hear stories of individuals who maybe unknowingly hurt or judge others they do not know or understand, while quoting Bible scriptures in the name of Jesus. These things are usually taken out of context on all sides to create hype or make someone feel right. It is because of this history that many individuals avoid the church and might not ever know what it feels like to receive unconditional love in the true Spirit of Christmas, Hanukkah and Kwanzaa. I am sorry. Forgive those who know not what they do. Forgive me when I fail to understand. Forgive me when I mess up and lack patience and kindness. We all fall short sometimes.

Christmas card that my daughter
Kaiya made a few years ago

I hope you know that you are loved, as you are, wherever you are in your personal journey. In this love, I hope you will enjoy giving and receiving this holiday season. In this light, I want to share a song that came through me in December, 2011. This reflects my personal journey and faith walk, so I am thankful that I can share freely. Know that I embrace all people and get that we might have different beliefs and experiences. However you connect, I wish you love, joy and peace all year. I love you!

Live, Give, Love, Laugh and Learn,
Shawna

Remember Me
- by Shawna Ray 2011

In the busyness of shopping malls
In the stress that comes with making meals
In this season that is filled with frills
A baby cries off in the distance

Remember me
Pure love and peace
Remember me
Your joy complete
My gift is free for eternity
Remember me

If acquiring things takes priority
Then the meaning here is unredeemed
There are people who are truly in need
Find your balance; give and receive

Remember me
Pure love and peace
Remember me
Your joy complete
My gift is free for eternity
Remember me

Remember December
Hold the baby near
Remember December
Look for light all year
Remember December
Slow it down to hear

The stillness of Spirit
Calling you near

Remember me
Pure love and peace
Remember me
Your joy complete
My gift is free for eternity
Remember me
Remember me

Moments and Memories

So this is it - the grand experiment

It's Christmas time and all my money's spent

In every scene there's so much marketing

Trying to make us scream, "I want!"

So what if I start sharing blame for this?

Stop trying to prove that I am more or less

My fashion sense, style and "etiquette"

Well I can't hardly spell that word

I want more time with you

I want hugs that are free

Please don't buy me any thing

Lend a hand, meet a need

I'm buying time to appreciate

All I have, may be cliche'

I want more love and peace

Making moments and memories

It can be tense, when family and friends

Bring baggage in years of experience

We get weighed down by all the bitterness

When freedom comes within forgiveness

Don't get me wrong, we need some boundaries

To have the space and remain healthy

It's never ending this growth and change

Let the good retain our focus

I want more time with you

I want hugs that are free

Please don't buy me any thing

Lend a hand, meet a need

Buying time to appreciate

All I have, may be cliche'

I want more love and peace

Making Moments and memories

Story telling, children laughing

Comfy cuddles on the couch

Music playing while we're cooking

No comparing, free from stress

Let it go and keep on smiling

There is value wrapped in kindness

Happiness is self contentment

Opening gifts with pure intent

I want more time with you

I want hugs that are free

Please don't buy me any thing

Lend a hand, meet a need

Buying time to appreciate

All I have, may be cliche'

Still I want more love and peace

Welcoming authenticity

Light the night with new awareness

Giving love and living peace

Sharing more moments and memories

-------

I posted these songs lyrics last year around Thanksgiving and want to share this again today with a reminder to spend more time with and less money on those we love this holiday season. 

A friend from college texted today to say that she was mailing me some gifts. She lives twenty minutes away from me and we have not seen each other in a while. In fact, we really need to talk through a misunderstanding. It made me laugh that she would buy me things, but not actually make time to talk to me. I don't have a lot of money and don't want to feel guilty for not buying her anything. I described this as "surburbia syndrome" and that pissed her off even more. We live such different lives and maybe it is time to let this friendship go. I just see things differently and am not so good at faking it. I want to see my friends face to face and if someone is in need, I want to give them a hug and let them know that I love them. 

Some people seem to hide so well behind their texts, emails  and "things" that keep a safe distance. They want to feel better about themselves by keeping up with token gifts and cards. This keeps the card and gift manufacturers in business, but it honestly does very little to truly build and strengthen relationships in my opinion. I guess we all have different love languages. Quality time is what means the most to me. And I am just tired of faking it when I hear things that have been said behind my back. Don't send me a card or gift and think that we are friends. If that makes me the odd one out, then so be it. I want to know who my true friends are and invest my time and energy with them. 

Life is short. Be present and make time for moments and memories in the now with those you truly love and respect this holiday season. 

Live, Give, Love, Laugh, Learn,

Shawna

Moments and Memories

So this is it - the grand experiment
It's Christmas time, the money's spent
In every scene there's so much marketing
Trying to make us scream, "I want!"

So what if I start sharing blame for this?
Stop trying to prove I'm more or less
With fashion sense, style and etiquette
Well I can't hardly spell the word

I want more time with you
I want hugs that are free
Please don't buy me any thing
Lend a hand, meet a need
Take time to appreciate
All we have, may be cliche
I want more love and peace
Making moments and memories

It can be tense, when family and friends
Bring baggage in years of experience
We get weighed down by bitterness
When freedom comes within forgiveness

Don't get me wrong, we need some boundaries
To have the space and remain healthy
It's never ending growth and change
Let the good retain our focus

I want more time with you
I want hugs that are free
Please don't buy me any thing
Lend a hand, meet a need
Make time to appreciate
All we have, may be cliche
I want more love and peace
Making Moments and memories

Story telling, children laughing
Comfy cuddles on the couch
Music playing while we're cooking
No comparing, free from stress
Let it go and keep on smiling
There's great value in kindness
Happiness is self contentment
Opening gifts with pure intent

I want more time with you
I want hugs that are free
Please don't buy me any thing
Lend a hand, meet a need
Make time to appreciate
All we have, may be cliche
Still I want more love and peace
Welcoming the Holy Spirit
Light the night with new awareness
Giving love and living peace
Sharing moments and memories

-Mama Shawna Ray,
November 19, 2012
The morning brought this new song and I have to share these days. I figure the time is stamped here for copyright while I also process the official. I so wish I had the means to record new music right now, but I figure these come through me to be shared in any way that I am able. This went out in an email to personal friends and I will add you to the list...
I've decided not to mail Christmas cards or buy forced gifts this year, but I want you to know that I am thinking of you today; so thankful that you are in my life. It's been a busy season of lessons learned. Thanks again to those who are local and took such good care of me while I recovered from yet another major surgery. The dreaded pelvic mesh has been removed! Phew! A painful three year ordeal. I am feeling much better and hope to get back to work soon.
Enjoy a Happy Thanksgiving! I am grateful for the moments and memories we've shared. May there be many more...

Live, Give, Love, Laugh, Learn,
Shawna

Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry®

#Columbus Ohio #Christmas Wish Gifted

Today I am meeting my half sister Amy for the first time! I found out two months ago that my Dad planted a seed when he was in college at Kent State, six months before he met my Mom. The birth Mother put the baby up for adoption in New Jersey. I've since talked to the birth mother and she told me that she did not give my Dad a choice in the matter but he did drive up to New Jersey to see her as soon as he found out and gave her some money to help out. My Dad was a very good Father and passed away fifteen years ago after battling cancer. I am not sure why he never told my brother and me, or anyone in his large family that he had a child out there. He told my Mom, but they choose to let it be because it was a closed adoption and laws were different back then. All we can do now is deal with today and move forward, grateful for this unexpected gift and that the internet makes it much easier to find people these days.

I have talked to Amy on the phone a lot and through email and pictures on facebook since we found out. The first thing that she said when she talked to her birth mother was, "Thank you for giving me life!" She shared with me that she use to wish upon stars, ask Santa, ask the Easter Bunny and pray often for siblings. She was raised as an only child by loving adoptive parents who could not conceive a birth child and they truly loved her as their own. Amy said she is comfortable in her relationship with her parents but wanted to know more about who she is, including family medical history to be aware of. She told me she has always dreamed of having a sister and we have enjoyed getting to know each other. She studied English and Television Film Production in college and now works as an actress in New York. It has been so cool to talk to her and feels like I have known her all my life. We had a DNA test done so that we can could all move forward with confidence and we got the confirming results back the day before Thanksgiving.

Amy went to meet her birth Mother and another sister and brother last weekend for the first time. And now she is coming here to Columbus! My Dad was the oldest of nine and had not told anyone else in his family either, so this was major news and a piece of my Dad we never knew existed. Amy will be meeting the whole Goebel family in Cleveland, Ohio on Saturday at our annual family Christmas party.

Of course, anything major in my life tends to end up in a song. (It's how I process these things). So I wanted to share today as I head to the airport to pick up MY SISTER!!! The BEST Christmas gift ever!

Long Lost Lullaby
By Shawna Ray

Hear a childhood wish
Sent into the universe
Bringing forth a gift
Unwrapping this relationship
It's future from the past
Choices that were made for us
And as excitement lifts
We are breathing in this newness

Place the missing puzzle piece
Into pictures of a family tree
You are a part of me.
Sing a long lost lullaby
Sort emotions now arriving
You are a beautiful leaf...
In the family tree
In our family tree

Feel the angels wings
Guardians who carried you here
Waters can be deep
Over seas now drawing near
We navigate this place
Different than we've ever known
We're open and awake
Welcoming the baby born

Place the missing puzzle piece
Into pictures of a family tree
You are a part of me.
Sing a long lost lullaby
Sort emotions now arriving
You are a beautiful leaf...
In the family tree
In our family tree

We won't claim or take away
Those who raised you up
All we can do now is add
To the cast of characters
In this crazy life to be continued...
Place the missing puzzle piece
Into pictures of a family tree
You are a part of me.
Sing a long lost lullaby
Sort emotions now arriving
You are a beautiful leaf...
In our family tree
In the family tree
Watering the seed
Growing family

Long lost lullaby
So glad you found me
Long lost lullaby
We are family

My brother always jokes to lighten the mood and says that he is also writing a less sentimental country song titled , "Your Past Will Catch Up With Your Ass." lol Life sure is full of surprises!

www.shawnaray.com

Remember Me

In the busyness of shopping malls
In the stress that comes with making meals
In this season that is filled with frills
A baby cries off in the distance
Remember me
Pure love and peace
Remember me
Your joy complete
My gift is free
Lasting eternity
Remember me
Remember me
If acquiring things is robbing you of peace
Then priorities are black friday indeed
There's people starving and truly in need
Try balancing with charity
Remember me
Pure love and peace
Remember me
Your joy complete
A gift for free
Lasting eternity
Remember me
Remember me
Remember December
Stay present with the presents
Remember December
Stay loving with the living
Remember December
Hold the baby near
Remember December
Slow it down to hear...
Remember me
Pure love and peace
Remember me
Your joy complete
My gift is free
Lasting for eternity
Remember me
Remember me
shawna ray, today 11/25/11
www.shawnaray.com