Friday, December 9, 2011

#Columbus Ohio #Christmas Wish Gifted

Today I am meeting my half sister Amy for the first time! I found out two months ago that my Dad planted a seed when he was in college at Kent State, six months before he met my Mom. The birth Mother put the baby up for adoption in New Jersey. I've since talked to the birth mother and she told me that she did not give my Dad a choice in the matter but he did drive up to New Jersey to see her as soon as he found out and gave her some money to help out. My Dad was a very good Father and passed away fifteen years ago after battling cancer. I am not sure why he never told my brother and me, or anyone in his large family that he had a child out there. He told my Mom, but they choose to let it be because it was a closed adoption and laws were different back then. All we can do now is deal with today and move forward, grateful for this unexpected gift and that the internet makes it much easier to find people these days.

I have talked to Amy on the phone a lot and through email and pictures on facebook since we found out. The first thing that she said when she talked to her birth mother was, "Thank you for giving me life!" She shared with me that she use to wish upon stars, ask Santa, ask the Easter Bunny and pray often for siblings. She was raised as an only child by loving adoptive parents who could not conceive a birth child and they truly loved her as their own. Amy said she is comfortable in her relationship with her parents but wanted to know more about who she is, including family medical history to be aware of. She told me she has always dreamed of having a sister and we have enjoyed getting to know each other. She studied English and Television Film Production in college and now works as an actress in New York. It has been so cool to talk to her and feels like I have known her all my life. We had a DNA test done so that we can could all move forward with confidence and we got the confirming results back the day before Thanksgiving.

Amy went to meet her birth Mother and another sister and brother last weekend for the first time. And now she is coming here to Columbus! My Dad was the oldest of nine and had not told anyone else in his family either, so this was major news and a piece of my Dad we never knew existed. Amy will be meeting the whole Goebel family in Cleveland, Ohio on Saturday at our annual family Christmas party.

Of course, anything major in my life tends to end up in a song. (It's how I process these things). So I wanted to share today as I head to the airport to pick up MY SISTER!!! The BEST Christmas gift ever!

Long Lost Lullaby
By Shawna Ray

Hear a childhood wish
Sent into the universe
Bringing forth a gift
Unwrapping this relationship
It's future from the past
Choices that were made for us
And as excitement lifts
We are breathing in this newness

Place the missing puzzle piece
Into pictures of a family tree
You are a part of me.
Sing a long lost lullaby
Sort emotions now arriving
You are a beautiful leaf...
In the family tree
In our family tree

Feel the angels wings
Guardians who carried you here
Waters can be deep
Over seas now drawing near
We navigate this place
Different than we've ever known
We're open and awake
Welcoming the baby born

Place the missing puzzle piece
Into pictures of a family tree
You are a part of me.
Sing a long lost lullaby
Sort emotions now arriving
You are a beautiful leaf...
In the family tree
In our family tree

We won't claim or take away
Those who raised you up
All we can do now is add
To the cast of characters
In this crazy life to be continued...
Place the missing puzzle piece
Into pictures of a family tree
You are a part of me.
Sing a long lost lullaby
Sort emotions now arriving
You are a beautiful leaf...
In our family tree
In the family tree
Watering the seed
Growing family

Long lost lullaby
So glad you found me
Long lost lullaby
We are family

My brother always jokes to lighten the mood and says that he is also writing a less sentimental country song titled , "Your Past Will Catch Up With Your Ass." lol Life sure is full of surprises!

www.shawnaray.com

Thursday, December 1, 2011

When Sunshine Meets Moonlight

When sunshine meets moonlight
The sparks fly in moments
They hang while in the distance
But then they separate...
Like sleep and play
The yin and yang

He won't fall from the stars
She won't fan out the flame
He's got demons to chase
She won't give up her faith

When sunshine meets moonlight
The Sparks fly in moments
They hang while in the distance
But then they separate
Like sleep and play
The yin and yang

She knows life needs night
Darkness craves the rays
Can they live apart...
Loving in their own way?

When sunshine meets moonlight
The sparks fly in moments
They hang while in the distance
Though never separate
Like sleep and play
The yin and yang

Move the heart beat in the ocean tide
As a Grandpa holds a baby child
Breathe forgiveness, love is souls aligned
We've finally found our place

The sunshine holds the moonlight
And sparks fly for a life time
They both shine in the new sky
And never separate
In sleep and play
The yin and yang
Are one today
They vow to stay
Through the night
There is light
Through the day
There is play

shawna ray, today 12/1/11
www.shawnaray.com