Thursday, May 24, 2012

Vicarious

Vicarious, I wish I was
Walking in shoes I don't lace up
Notorious, not showing up
Detoured from what I say I want

Casting for a big fish
with a little hook
Somehow got the bait and switch
It's a chance I took
Dreaming of a someday
Man it could be good
If I could get out of my own way

Oblivious, to what it takes
I wish on stars and hesitate
Unanimous, we all have days
When go is stopped and we are late

Jumping through a big hoop with no clue
How to get to Oz when
Stuck inside a zoo
Dreaming of a someday
Man it could be good
If I could get out of my own way

Get out of my own head
Get out of the fear that
Only hurts me when I let it
Walking right on through this
Saying you can do this!
Come on little scaredy cat!
Do you really want to live...

Various?
Though conscious of...

Casting for a big fish
With a little hook
Finally I am baited with a long heavy thread
Holding tight and looking out not in
Man this will be really good
Reeling in reeling in...
Reaching for the good is when you catch it!
Now release it if you can...


Casting for a big fish
with a little hook
Somehow got the bait and switch
It's a chance I took
Dreaming of a someday
Man it could be good
If I could get out of my own way
Doing things my own way, my own way


Shawna Ray yesterday, 5/25/12
The idea for video to this song is very cool. Yes I know I am a fool with limited outlets ...

www.shawnaray.com

Sunday, May 20, 2012

It Is What It Is

It's strange this time
Talking over wine
BB King playing like he's giving advise
You are my friend
And it is what it is
I can't tell my heart who to love, how to live

Ooh ooh ooh
This one is a miss
Ooh ooh ooh
It is what it is

I fell in love
It never seemed to work
Frozen in time with a jaded heart
I'm glad you're here
I love you my dear
Brother and sister with a hug at the door

Ooh ooh ooh
This one is a miss
Ooh ooh ooh
It is what it is

I cannot imagine you not in my life
But it's missing that thing, you know that we've tried
You deserve someone who will love you like you do

Ooh ooh ooh
This one is a miss
Ooh ooh ooh
It is what it is

Ooh ooh ooh
This one is a miss
Ooh ooh ooh
It is what it is
It is what it is
It is what it is

Shawna Ray, today, May 20, 2012
www.shawnaray.com

Monday, May 14, 2012

I'm listening to John Mayer


Captured the 11:11 Countdown to #JohnMayer new album Born and Raised streaming for free. I already bought the album and look forward to May 22nd release, but early first listen is cool. An unexpected gift. Like the time I went to LA for an author's conference and found out via twitter that John was doing an impromptu secret show at the Troubadour a block away from where I was staying. 

True story…My friend since sixth grade, Michelle's husband had passed away a week before and her kids were going to stay with family for the weekend. She didn't want to be alone in the house, so I bought her a plane ticket at the last minute so she could come with me to California to relax and enjoy the sunshine while I was at the SCBWI Society of Children's Book Writers and Illustrators conference. We had planned to go to dinner that night after the session. I checked Twitter and got the message late about the concert. I was also scheduled to pitch a show idea from my children's book to Disney and Nickelodeon that next day and John was on Twitter talking about pitching a show somewhere. At the time it all seemed like some sort of fickle finger of fate that I was there and he was there. I am also a singer songwriter, and I wish I had pursued that earlier in life before I had kids and became a single Mom that needs to work. In that same breath, I have no regrets. I love my kids and enjoy my music that is not based on making money. 

We got there and found out that the show was sold out for us ordinary folk. So we went to eat and grumble at an Italian restaurant next door. Some of John's friends were right next to us at the bar saying John was on his way. When we were walking out I saw a body guard and then this guy came out and met these skinny California girls and started to lead them into the back room. I say that because I was feeling self conscious after gaining weight in the midst of some health challenges. In Ohio I look normal but California is full of skinny people it seems like. Anyway, all of a sudden I just found myself walking in behind these girls like I belonged there and was with them. John was at a long table eating with his friends and crew. They watched the two girls sit down and then all looked at me standing there like, "Who are you?" I felt stupid and walked on through because I didn't want to interrupt or for him to think I'm a strange stalker. I had thought that I would say, "Hi John. I'm Shawna Ray. Could you please open up more tickets so we can get into the show?" 

Instead I walked right past him and back to the bathroom, laughing at myself. I still can't believe I had the guts to walk in that room and then wimped out!?! I was seriously looking in the bathroom mirror and laughing at myself like WTF??? People are people, no matter what their title or celebrity status is in my opinion. But maybe I do crush a bit on this one and it freaked me out that he would look at me as a crazed fan. Maybe I am a crazy fan? All artists have those who inspire us- right? I am a music lover. Say what you will...John Mayer is still my favorite guitar player and songwriter. I dream of collaborating on a song with him one day. It could happen- right!?! Dream a little dream... 

So we went back and waited in line because they said there was a chance we could get in if seats became available from "no shows" on the important people list. I was so pissed that I almost left, but Michelle would not let me. Truth is,  it was one of those defining moments because I was mad at myself for living vicariously. I wish I was playing at the Troubadour with MY band, or at least  doing more with my life so I could have my name on the list and get in to see a show if I want to. What is that about anyway? My work in the inner city helps to empower people to move beyond poverty. Why is that not on the A list? The human list? I want to do more, but I have two kids who need me. I think my songs are okay for something I produced myself on a limited budget with no experience or guidance from professionals. I know I could do more. But I haven't.  And now I am babbling about it. I work in Public Relations and have coordinated large events. I understand crowd control. So it is what it is. The good news is we did get into the show after the first song and it was worth the wait. Small crowd, cool venue and we were close to the stage on the steps stage left. Felt like old times, when I first discovered John's music in college and had the time to take it all in. It was a great night. So much has happened since then...  


OK, so why is this thing not streaming yet? Ahhh the time space continuum is gonna kill me. I was up till 3 am last night working on the dreaded annual report for work. Sleep might just make me wait a few more days for new music. Yay! A Tumblr friend just told me to change the time on my computer. Brilliant! Thanks Tumblr friend. Streaming myself to sleep with Born and Raised. All good. 

Saturday, May 12, 2012

Picture of Love (Mom) song Chords and soundtrack by Shawna Ray


Picture of Love (Mom)
Singer/Songwriter, Shawna Ray, Open album, ASCAP
Download instrumental soundtrack to sing it yourself:http://shawnaray.bandcamp.com/track/mom-instrumental
Make your own picture video: 

                 Bb                          Eb                         Bb                   Eb
Picture of love, you are my mother.  We have a special kind of bond.
                   Bb                                     Eb                   Gm                  Cm
You have a heart that cares no matter, so that I can feel at home.
                 Eb                           D                     Cm                  Am
You are the one who’ll sit and listen, with a helping hand to lend
        Eb                        D                           Ab                         F
And now, as we are growing, you’ve become one of my best friends.

                     Bb  F                  C         Eb
A picture of love, a pillar of strength,
Eb                       Bb     F                    Cm         Eb
With comforting warmth and beautiful grace;
                    Cm
Thank you Mom,
                F                       Ab
You have been there for me.


                 Bb                          Eb                         Bb                   Eb
Picture a smile, a lifelong teacher, cheering me to always try
              Bb                           Eb                      Gm                  Cm
You give hugs and won’t let go when you know I need to be held
                 Eb               D                     Cm                  Am
You don’t claim to be perfect, but you love your family.
             Eb                   D                                 Ab                          F
What a gift when you admitted you’ve been learning along with me.
                      Bb                     C    Eb
A picture of love, pillar of strength,
Eb                       Bb     F                    Cm         Eb
With comforting warmth and grace;
       Cm
Thank you Mom,
    F                       Ab
You have been there…
            G/C                 Bb                   Cm                 F/D
For time together with lots of laughter, over meals we talk, (and talk and talk)
            Eb                    Bb                   Cm                              F
Those memories I will always treasure even after you pass on...
            Gm                  F/A                       Ab                          Bb
Picture respect and gratitude; picture my arms wrapped around you;
             Gm                 F/A                  Eb                           Bb                                   
Picture a child saying, “I love you.  Thank you for being there”…
      Gm F
A picture of love,
                        Cm Eb
Pillar of strength,
Eb                       Bb     F                    Cm         Eb
With comforting warmth and beautiful grace;
                        Gm                  Am
I picture your wise, forgiving face,
                        Ab       Bb
Waiting and praying; full of faith.
                   G/C                      Am
Thank you Mom, you have been there
                        G/C                       Am
Thank you Mom, you’ve always been there
                        G/C                 Ab                       Bb
Thank you Mom, you have been my picture of love